Friday, August 26, 2005

I have realized how some people tend to take things for granted and undeniably, it really pisses me off. Maybe its because of the environment that I am in, or maybe its because I'm told not to dismiss whatever I have so freely, so simply. Okay, I am the only child in my family, but I've been brought up, in a rather conservative Chinese family, so to say, my parents are rather strict about my moral values and all sorts. They don't want me to be dependent, so we never had a maid, despite my mum being so busy and she hardly has the time to clean up the house or whatsoever. I�m not that spoilt, really. At least, I don't rely on people to bring my drinks out from the kitchen, neither do I rely on them to help me tidy my stuff, wash my clothes, or cook my meals. I am actually confident enough to say that I'm able to do all that without difficulty. But seriously, how many people are that independent nowadays? Blame it on the parents who spoil their kids, blame it on the maids, whatever! You know when you go to the bottom of everything, its just you and yourself, the way you look at things. So, if you are an independent person, your reliance on your maid might be not so. I'm not criticizing all the people who have maids or anything, but I'm just thinking, is it because our standard of living is getting higher and higher, and many of us are really so blessed with the luxury of staying in a big house, having a high allowance, studying in a good school, sitting in a posh car etc. And when the rest of the population takes bus home, we�re so lazy we actually take cabs! Seriously, come to think of it, our cab fare for one day is like one meal for the Bangladesh workers. They save up every single penny of theirs, so that they could go back to their homeland and open a small shop so that their family could have a good life.


I often reflect on the way I lived and I have decided that I'm quite contented with what I have. What more could I ask for. Well, yah, I don't have my BMW, neither do I stay in a bungalow, but I have a pretty house that I'm proud of, parents who love me, lovely dogs and supportive friends. I'm a lucky shit, really. So what if my parents aren't earning millions, so what if I'm not the top student in my shitty school, I like my life and that's it. I don't ask for anything more. Like what my father says, I might be poor among the rich, but I'm definitely rich among the poor. So why should I be unhappy?


Those people who are striving to be rich 24/7 are pathetic I think. Not that having a big dream is not good, but when you reach the stage when you forgo everything just for money, its not worth it. Not worth it at all. But do they care, they don't. True enough, money works wonders. We can't do anything without money. Money can buy you houses, cars, and almost everything! It can even buy you friends, but when you don't have any more money, where are your friends? POOF. They'll be gone in three seconds I tell you.


I was talking to siewmun today when I realized all these things. That how the people around me are treating what they have so lightly because they are just fucking rich, seriously! Okay, maybe they don't think they are rich but they are. Well, they don't really admit it, but they are really sheltered in a world when money is not a problem to them. It comes so naturally to them that they treat it like nothing! I'm quite appalled by this behavior and that might explain my violent reactions to certain things. Because I don't take things for granted. I know one day my father's business might just topple, that's why I appreciate what I have currently. No one is going to be rich forever eh? Say this girl, she's smart and rich and she has everything. Her father is the CEO of some GREAAATTT company but if she doesn't work hard on her part, all the wealth that she has now will just flow through her hands. Yeah, you say, she's smart and rich, so its okay if she doesn't study. But fuck! That's not the case! You are smart, you don't study, you have never even read the book once, say even a genius won't even know what to do ok! Unless you tell me you know every single thing under the world. Her father is the CEO of the company, but that doesn't mean that she'll take over either. If she stopped her education at this level, you think only with that big brain of hers she will make it big? No way man. Her smartness won't take her that far. Yeah, you say people who didn't finish their education still made it big. But how small is the percentage of the millions in this world?. Sad to say, being smart is nothing if you're not hardworking.


I'm sorry if I'm too critical. I'm sorry if I even offended anyone. But these are just my feelings and if I have said anything wrong, please, really, do enlighten me. Sometimes I really feel like I'm too critical because I often feel that everyone around me has something wrong at a certain point of time. Yeah I understand that no one is perfect, and of course, I'm one of the least perfect ones. Mum says that criticizing people all the time is not very nice, yeah I know. It makes people think that I'm probably thinking like I'm superior to everyone. But no, no, that's not for me. From what I know, I have a lot of flaws, really. It's just that I'm quite sensitive at certain times, and some things just strike me as it is and you know, being me, I need to voice it out. I have been thinking of this for quite some time and sigh. It's been troubling me. (Tell me if I'm thinking too much)


Ah. I have too much love for this world.


huiyi rants at 8:52 PM